Fabulously Five

Growing up, I always knew I wanted to have children because of how cuddly and squishy infants are. I also used to tell others that I only liked babies because preschoolers were little brats. There is a Korean description – 미운다섯살 – that translates to “Detestable Five”.

I remember holding Elise as a newborn and wishing she would stay tiny for longer. Nope, it didn’t happen. She is now five. 😭 Having been propelled into big sister status at two meant a lot of my attention was naturally diverted. She sometimes gets into physical altercations with Emmett, yet she is fiercely protective of him everywhere else. 🙄

Generally, she is quite a pleasant child to be around! I was worried that she would be alienated due to her condition but Elise is strong indeed. She doesn’t let it get in her way. When unknown kids at the playground discuss her eye in front of her, I get infuriated on her behalf, yet she just brushes it off and tells them it’s her magic eye.She is proactive in making new friends and I always know she’ll do fine in new classes. She doesn’t mind making herself look silly if makes others laugh. Her repertoire includes the “Rody Dance”, inspired by the robot in Pororo and an incredulous “huh, WHAT?!” that comes complete with an eye roll. One of the things I like the most about her is that she’s not demanding. She wanted a unicorn rainbow cake, but lazy mama here just got her to choose her a tiny cake off the shelf from Chateraise, and they surely didn’t have what she wanted. Neither did she ask where her birthday gift was. It is nowhere, because I buy gifts randomly so they don’t expect presents each birthday.She’s also an animal lover and likes “cats and dogs but cats a little bit more”. Her current ambition is to become a zookeeper and she is prepared to do the dirty work of clearing animal poop in addition to caring for them. Let’s see how that goes!

How Emmett almost went to Heaven

If you took certain parts of my life and filmed it, they might fit nicely into a K-drama. From having a cystectomy to remove giant ovarian cysts, meeting my hub online, not seeing how he looked like until the day we met in real life, to Elise’s retinoblastoma, it’s like God was trying to be funny.

Emmett used to cling onto me when he was in the water until I put on arm floats on him and he realised that he could swim. Relying on arm floats can be dangerous and give a false sense of confidence. Sure enough, he’s been playing in the medium 0.9M pool with the bigger kids while I watch from a near distance. Yesterday, we ended our swim session earlier than usual. After a quick shower, I offered to let them play at the playground. Elise walked ahead, I followed with the stroller and Emmett trailed behind. Or so I thought. 99% of the time he’s either in the stroller or walking ahead. Not long after, I heard a woman shout, “有小孩跳进去!” “A kid jumped in!”. I turned around and what did I see?Emmett in his clothes with mask on, submerged in the pool with the water above his head. As opposed to drowning scenes in shows, drowning victims do not flail their arms around and shout for help.

Emmett was as still as a statue (hurhur punny) and he neither showed any sign of struggle, nor attempt to float. I may not be an expert swimmer, but I can do a decent breaststroke. Besides, I wasn’t going to wait for someone else to swim across the length of the pool to save him. I would love to say I dived in immediately, but my logical mind knew that removing my phone and slingbag wouldn’t take more than a second. I hopped into the pool and brought him up to safety. We were two soaking wet bodies with no spare clothes, but we were alive.

He didn’t get any water in his lungs, a fact that was confirmed by him being very alert and conscious and wailing. 🙄 I took off his wet top and brought them both for an ice cream treat by the roadside and then for dinner. 🙄 Emmett, giving us heart attacks since 2017.

FIVE

Today marks the fifth year we signed the legal papers. We registered our marriage in Korea earlier but didn’t hold any ceremony – all we did was fill up a form at the district office and get them to register it in their system. We didn’t really intend to have a celebration here, but my aunt and uncle generously offered to help us organise a simple ROM ceremony at their home. It was a warm and humid afternoon and everyone was perspiring buckets in their dresses and shirts. 😅 My husband butchered his hair by going to a cheapo salon the day before and it resembled a bird’s nest. I was a heavily pregnant whale who didn’t bother to exercise. 🤣 In these five years, we’ve mellowed down a lot. At the start, we had the most dramatic arguments involving flying objects to being surrounded by crowds in a mall during a shouting match, him leaving the house to cool down, me spam-calling him whenever he was out with his friends.We have both grown in various aspects. We’ve added two minions, expanded our waistlines (his abs have converged into a blob of fat) and I can now counter his arguments in Korean while making sense. Even after five years, there are moments where my actions cause him to fanboy over me. Case in point: I was working out and he stood by the door and went “You’re so cute!”. There must be something fatally attractive about me for him to feel that way when I’m overweight with a tummy and in my ratty tee and shorts. #hotmamaalert 치.명.적.인.매.력. And that’s how a post about my wedding anniversary ends, with me weird flexing about how he still finds me desirable. If a man can feel that way after witnessing two natural deliveries from the bloody side and can handle all my emotional outbursts, I guess he’s in for the long-run.

#weddinganniversary #결혼기념일